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I suspect that on some level before Simon declared himself separated Erin thought that her marriage was a brilliant success on her own original design, and that Simon recognized his privilege in being part of it.
This is the point that galls me. I am sure Simon isn't a perfect person, nobody is. However, from our brief experience with Simon even after the fact he knows she was the person who killed his beloved family (whether he believes it to be accidental or otherwise), he still didn't have anything bad to say about her.
He still, 7 years after separation, was a supportive "husband". He was still paying more than he should have. He was still engaging with her and her exhausting histrionic rants about the perceived slights from his saintly parents who seemed excessively supportive.
I don't know any men who would hang around 7 years after separation being the model husband like this. I think she felt forever entitled to having a husband and his family support, but not actually having a husband. It's as though she wanted all of the perks of being married, and all of the perks of being single. It's mind boggling how privileged this woman is, but still feels hard done by. IMO