Canada - Lucas Fowler, Chynna Deese, and Leonard Dyck, all murdered, Alaska Hwy, BC, Jul 2019 #17

[Gina20]

I hear you.
How to get your needs met is the struggle in life isn't it?

I think this is why a mediator is needed. People don't always express the reason behind their needs, especially in times of loss. If an RCMP psychologist-mediator would step in and sit down face-to-face with AS, it could help. JMO.

 

[Schmoosh]

An email of the exchange obtained by The Canadian Press says the video is about how Bryer wanted his body to be dealt with after his death.

In the email, the RCMP says the information about Bryer’s wishes was passed on to his mother and that police plan on publicly addressing the video in a media release in the next few weeks.

Leamon says she doesn’t know how the email became public, but she verified its contents.

The RCMP did not immediately respond to a request for comment.
Father of Bryer Schmegelsky seeks access to final video taken before murder suspect’s suicide

And just like everyone else in his life, he just screwed his own lawyer by publicizing the email.

I do believe BS's mother and various court-appointed specialists when they say he suffers from mental illness. I hope he shuts up and finally accepts the help he has so sorely needed for years.

 

[Gina20]

Another scenario no one has considered: that Bryer stated in the video that he doesn't want his Dad anywhere near his funeral/burial/celebration of life/whateveryoucallit, and may have even stated he didn't want AS to see the video itself.

We just don't know, and may never.

Oh, yes. That is why he needs to know what was said in that video. He needs to see it, IMO.

 

[katydid23]

well if he is the only excluded parent it does look like he is being treated not very well

Maybe that is his own doing. He went to jail for criminal harassment and his ex wife feared for her life. He has mental health issues and does not control his anger well. She had to get legal restraining orders against him.

So maybe that is why he is not being treated so well.

 

[SteveP]

Family deaths bring out the best in some families, and bring out the worst in some families. I know, because in my lifetime, I have seen both extremes. Forgetting for a moment who is the 'legal' NoK, it seems that surely BS's parents could put aside animosity for one final time, and after that, if they so desire, there seems to be nothing else connecting them, and they can go on with their own separate lives, never again to have to interact with one another. I am pretty sure that could be safely accommodated. I know many here think BS's dad wants to see the video and run sell a story to a paying media. Maybe he does, but MAYBE he just wants to see his son on video one last time. And maybe he truly does just want to visit his son's gravesite...maybe even to tell his son he is sorry for his failures as a father. JMO

 

[Gina20]

And just like everyone else in his life, he just screwed his own lawyer by publicizing the email.

Not necessarily. We're talking about it. Aren't we?

 

[sandbar]

I think this is why a mediator is needed. People don't always express the reason behind their needs, especially in times of loss. If an RCMP psychologist-mediator would step in and sit down face-to-face with AS, it could help. JMO.

We don't know if an RCMP psychologist-mediator has been offered or accepted. There are people who lose loved ones, don't have remains to be in the same room with, and figure out other ways to achieve "closure".

 

[Schmoosh]

Oh, yes. That is why he needs to know what was said in that video. He needs to see it, IMO.

Against his son's dying wishes? (if that's what happened, that is my entire point)

 

[katydid23]

According to this, Alan was not invited to the funeral nor does he even know where Bryer's body is. Very sad.

Father of BC murder suspect fighting to see video of 'last will and testament'

According to this, AS BELIEVES there was a funeral and a burial. But we do not know if there really was a funeral or a burial.
There may have been a cremation, without a formal funeral service of any kind.

 

[Schmoosh]

Not necessarily. We're talking about it. Aren't we?

Huh? We didn't bring the email between his lawyer and the RCMP to the public's attention. He (mostly likely) did. Otherwise, either her firm or the RCMP has a leak problem.

 

[FactFinder3000]

Huh? We didn't bring the email between his lawyer and the RCMP to the public's attention. He (mostly likely) did. Otherwise, either her firm or the RCMP has a leak problem.

The point was that the lawyer is enjoying the free publicity. She is the opposite of 'screwed over.'

 

[katydid23]

this is why I have issue with him not getting info. why would info harm anyone? they don't have to sit on the same bench at a funeral or even agree on anything to do with a funeral or memorial to give him info.

Info like that could easily harm someone.

My Aunt went through a similar divorce experience as AS and his ex.

Her husband was very angry and bitter about the divorce and began stalking and harassing her. He sent her death threats, left threatening phone messages, and then left threats at various family members homes.

I think AS exhibited similar behaviour because he went to jail for his criminal harassment.

Once someone has harassed you with threats of violence, and threatened to harm your parents, and sent scary packages to your home, you are so cautious and leery of everything.

So in cases like this, info about where you and your family are going to be gathered needs to be kept secret. The family would feel very vulnerable to his anger and resentment.

 

[Gina20]

Huh? We didn't bring the email between his lawyer and the RCMP to the public's attention. He (mostly likely) did. Otherwise, either her firm or the RCMP has a leak problem.

Exposing the email has brought the existence of video into the light. This is not necessarily putting some kind of roadblock between AS and his lawyer. If anything, it proves that he told the truth: a video exists, and he is not allowed to see it.

 

[Zella]

Info like that could easily harm someone.

My Aunt went through a similar divorce experience as AS and his ex.

Her husband was very angry and bitter about the divorce and began stalking and harassing her. He sent her death threats, left threatening phone messages, and then left threats at various family members homes.

I think AS exhibited similar behaviour because he went to jail for his criminal harassment.

Once someone has harassed you with threats of violence, and threatened to harm your parents, and sent scary packages to your home, you are so cautious and leery of everything.

So in cases like this, info about where you and your family are going to be gathered needs to be kept secret. The family would feel very vulnerable to his anger and resentment.

Based on how bitter their divorce was and the fallout, I don't blame either one of them for not wanting to be in the room with the other one. It honestly sounds like a recipe for disaster, so I don't blame Bryer's mom if that's what she was thinking. That doesn't preclude, however, him having the opportunity to schedule a time for when he could go when the other side of the family wasn't there or him having the knowledge of where Bryer's remains ended up so that he could pay his respects. MOO

That's of course assuming there ever was the opportunity to do that. For all we know, BS and KM might still be sitting in a funeral home in Winnipeg while arrangements are made to bring them back to BC or they might already be scattered.

 

[Gina20]

And just like everyone else in his life, he just screwed his own lawyer by publicizing the email.

I do believe BS's mother and various court-appointed specialists when they say he suffers from mental illness. I hope he shuts up and finally accepts the help he has so sorely needed for years.

I noticed in one of the articles that he was ordered into therapy, but could not afford to continue paying for it. So how would that work, ordering him to pay for his own therapy, now that he is homeless and living in a van?

 

[Gina20]

Against his son's dying wishes? (if that's what happened, that is my entire point)

We don't know if it was against his son's wishes, and I don't believe he would accept such a thing except from his son's own mouth, on video. IMO. Some people need to see to believe. This won't go away unresolved as it now stands.

 

[CanadianMade]

I was thinking this too...what sort of funeral requests do 18-year-olds make? Especially one prone to some pretty terrible decisions.

It could have been very inappropriate, along the lines of ‘spread my ashes at the scene of Prof. Dyck’s murder.’

If that was the request, I very much doubt it would have been shown to anyone. Even the family.

 

[SnooperDuper]

RCMP released only that segment of the video that dealt with BS's last wishes for his funeral to the person responsible for the funeral on a need to know basis.

As for the rest of it, "Schmegelsky told CHEK News Saturday that 'I just want to lay flowers on my kids grave… I wasn’t invited to his funeral. I don’t even know where he is. Just another stab in my heart by authorities.'"

Father of BC murder suspect fighting to see video of 'last will and testament'

The RCMP is not at all involved in announcing the funeral or the location where BS is to be interred: that information is in the hands of family and not at all the RCMP.

"[Leamon] is not ruling out taking legal action against the RCMP." AS wants his lawyer to sue the RCMP because his estranged wife doesn't want him at the funeral???

From the same article, the lawyer says "He is looking for closure, like any father would."...but will there be closure? Maybe the video will raise more questions for AS than it answers. Who will he sue then? God?

 

[1987]

Info like that could easily harm someone.

My Aunt went through a similar divorce experience as AS and his ex.

Her husband was very angry and bitter about the divorce and began stalking and harassing her. He sent her death threats, left threatening phone messages, and then left threats at various family members homes.

I think AS exhibited similar behaviour because he went to jail for his criminal harassment.

Once someone has harassed you with threats of violence, and threatened to harm your parents, and sent scary packages to your home, you are so cautious and leery of everything.

So in cases like this, info about where you and your family are going to be gathered needs to be kept secret. The family would feel very vulnerable to his anger and resentment.

so just never tell the man anything about his sons remains because a woman is afraid? I don't understand at all. a simple no arrangements have been made or a simple what the arrangements were if they are complete. I am not suggesting the mom send out notices of her current address and exact time and place of where she intends to be. there is a medium ground that could allow AS to have information.

 

[SnooperDuper]

I noticed in one of the articles that he was ordered into therapy, but could not afford to continue paying for it. So how would that work, ordering him to pay for his own therapy, now that he is homeless and living in a van?

I'd think once he became unemployed and indigent that he would be able to access free therapy. It was probably the fact that he was working that he was expected to contribute to the costs of therapy.