Family Dynamics

[BeavisMom62]

I have 4 children (3 daughters and 1 son) They are all grown up now. My son is bi-polar and 1 of my daughters is too. It is very hard to raise a child like that even with getting them counseling and with medication. I am sure Tawni's mother didn't seek any mental help for her. That she acted out like that at school is a very good indication that she was very angry on the inside. I also have no doubt she had been sexually abused another reason for her behavior. This is what happens to kids when their parents give up and don't give a ****!!

Yeah TL, I seriously doubt that Tawni was bipolar, don't you? I think that Deb was probably being mean or sarcastic. Being the sort of "mother" that we have been told that she was, how would she even know? She wasn't a good mother like you, or me, or the rest of us. You know that Tawni wasn't given counseling or medication or even evaluated. I don't think that Deb could put forth the hard effort it would take to raise a bipolar child, much less an "easy" child! Deb is just reacting to Tawni's actions at the way Tawni had been treated. Of course she was angry on the inside, and as you said, probably sexually or at least abused otherwise. That doesn't make the poor girl bipolar. Its just more "Deb-speak". Otherwise known as "cover my a**"!". Poor girl. RIP Tawni. And happy belated Birthday.

 

[believe09]

Yeah TL, I seriously doubt that Tawni was bipolar, don't you? I think that Deb was probably being mean or sarcastic. Being the sort of "mother" that we have been told that she was, how would she even know? She wasn't a good mother like you, or me, or the rest of us. You know that Tawni wasn't given counseling or medication or even evaluated. I don't think that Deb could put forth the hard effort it would take to raise a bipolar child, much less an "easy" child! Deb is just reacting to Tawni's actions at the way Tawni had been treated. Of course she was angry on the inside, and as you said, probably sexually or at least abused otherwise. That doesn't make the poor girl bipolar. Its just more "Deb-speak". Otherwise known as "cover my a**"!". Poor girl. RIP Tawni. And happy belated Birthday.

Actually, Tawni was institutionalized and in various programs at least from the time she was 11. Like a classic manic depressive, imo, she didn't like to take her med's-it numbed her. I have not discussed diagnoses with any of the family members associated with the case-I have just listened. But I do not think it is a bad choice of possible issues.

I do not know if she was sexually molested/abused-there has not been even a whisper of discussion around it. I do not know if step-dad ever did any hands on discipline at all-I did ask Det. L to see if he could figure out if Tawni's fat lip came before she left her home-I assume he will run this one by LDJ.

 

[Teresa Larson]

Actually, Tawni was institutionalized and in various programs at least from the time she was 11. Like a classic manic depressive, imo, she didn't like to take her med's-it numbed her. I have not discussed diagnoses with any of the family members associated with the case-I have just listened. But I do not think it is a bad choice of possible issues.

I do not know if she was sexually molested/abused-there has not been even a whisper of discussion around it. I do not know if step-dad ever did any hands on discipline at all-I did ask Det. L to see if he could figure out if Tawni's fat lip came before she left her home-I assume he will run this one by LDJ.

The only person that would know about her sexual abuse (If she was) would be the perpetrator. Those things usually don't come out until much later in life and if they did her mom would have just been in denial. Especially if it was the step-dad doing it. Her behavior is consistent with a sexually abused child. It's possible she was bi-polar. Kids or teenagers never want to take their medicine That's very typical of them. So she was diagnosed with something?? That doesn't surprise me at all.

 

[Fairy1]

I don't have the feeling that Tawni was sexually abused. As I mentioned before, if her step-dad was sexually abusing her, he would NEVER have let her leave so easily that day....IMO. Physically abused? Probably. But I sincerely doubt Brian ever missed her or gave a sh** after she disappeared. He's clearly been inconvenienced by her being ID'd when he expected her to just disappear forever. There is a place for people like him. And like her mother, who FAILED to protect and care for her...

 

[Teresa Larson]

All indications are that she was sexually abused. For one she was a run away and she was a prostitute. If she was abused it was when she was a child not after she got older. Usually once a child gets older they will tell somebody about it or give the pedophile such a hard time that they wouldn't be able to sexually abuse them. If her step dad was a pedophile he wouldn't have tried stopping her. Pedophiles do not give a about their victims. He also could have been on to his next victim since Tawni was older. Tawni might have even told her mom about it and the mom was in denial She probably stuck up for her husband It could also be the reason he hated her so much.

 

[Zanko]

Was Tawny sexually abused? Sexual abuse has many forms. Sometimes it can be through "sexualizing" the child or making them feel responsible for their own safety in the matter. I think her behavior indicates some form of sexual abuse.

I don't know if Tawny was prostituting or not. My vote is if she was she may have been forced to do this once or twice and then stood up to WW "no more". (Then the fight ensued.) With that said, remember that the ME postulated that Maricopa Jane Doe was a prostitute, which said to me that she had some physical reason to believe this. It makes me curious to what physical signs there were to suggest she was a prostitute rather than a sexually active teen?

If Tawny were institutionalized, she would mostly likely have been given a series of assessments to determine a diagnosis. This is probably in her medical records. It may be important to any prosecution of WW/LDJ to know what her diagnosis was. Unfortunately, it may help their defense that she "jumped" from the vehicle.

 

[BeavisMom62]

Actually, Tawni was institutionalized and in various programs at least from the time she was 11. Like a classic manic depressive, imo, she didn't like to take her med's-it numbed her. I have not discussed diagnoses with any of the family members associated with the case-I have just listened. But I do not think it is a bad choice of possible issues.

I do not know if she was sexually molested/abused-there has not been even a whisper of discussion around it. I do not know if step-dad ever did any hands on discipline at all-I did ask Det. L to see if he could figure out if Tawni's fat lip came before she left her home-I assume he will run this one by LDJ.

Oh, wow! So she really did have an actual diagnosis then, Believe? I really wouldn't have thought so, I was just assuming sour grapes on the part of the mom, if you know what I mean. I guess I can understand about the not taking the meds though. I was lucky. My son wasn't bipolar, but was diagnosed with depression/anxiety disorder from middle school to high school. I fought for years about putting him on meds, but once he was on them, they made such a huge difference! I never had any problem getting him to take them. Thank goodness. Poor Tawni.

 

[VASHLEY88]

The allegation that Tawni may have been molested by her step father or someone else in her family is going to be really hard to prove, IMO. Unfortunately since they believe she was prostituting, any genital/pelvic injury could mimic sexual abuse. If she sustained no pelvic injury from being abused sexually it's going to be even harder to prove. But if she did endure sexual abuse from her step father, or any type of abuse for that matter, I hope he does get called out on it and evidence points to him, and he does rot in a prison cell for the rest of his life.

Yes, a lot of Tawni's characteristics from what we know so far are compatiable with those of a sexually abused victim, but a lot of those characteristcs are also common in emotionally unstable people. I have depression and anxiety and when I didn't take my Effexor/Klonopin when I was younger, I could, and still can get pretty downright defiant, aggressive and unreasonable. Personality disorders and especially not having a positive male example can also cause promuscuity, and I'm not trying to say Tawni was, but some individuals can interpret sexual acts as love. Just throwing that out there since there has been no mention from the family that Tawni was sexually abused. If she was sexually abused though, wouldn't she want to make herself less attractive? She was pretty meticulous about her grooming and appearance.

 

[believe09]

The allegation that Tawni may have been molested by her step father or someone else in her family is going to be really hard to prove, IMO. Unfortunately since they believe she was prostituting, any genital/pelvic injury could mimic sexual abuse. If she sustained no pelvic injury from being abused sexually it's going to be even harder to prove. But if she did endure sexual abuse from her step father, or any type of abuse for that matter, I hope he does get called out on it and evidence points to him, and he does rot in a prison cell for the rest of his life.

Yes, a lot of Tawni's characteristics from what we know so far are compatiable with those of a sexually abused victim, but a lot of those characteristcs are also common in emotionally unstable people. I have depression and anxiety and when I didn't take my Effexor/Klonopin when I was younger, I could, and still can get pretty downright defiant, aggressive and unreasonable. Personality disorders and especially not having a positive male example can also cause promuscuity, and I'm not trying to say Tawni was, but some individuals can interpret sexual acts as love. Just throwing that out there since there has been no mention from the family that Tawni was sexually abused. If she was sexually abused though, wouldn't she want to make herself less attractive? She was pretty meticulous about her grooming and appearance.

It hurts me to hear the pain you went through, as well as Fairy and TL as children/teens...

Tawni did interpret affection from guys as love-attraction, gifts and the like. This comes from her brother-he told me that she had lots and lots of trouble at school being teased and harassed-he spent a lot of time fighting over it. She had dyslexia and some other learning issues, but Mom told me she has a published book of Tawni's artwork that was sponsored by a third party...simply because her talent was so outstanding. Tawni was by all accounts sweet, loving and quick to trust-but lashed out when people were being "mean." She wanted to be an actress-and she was already a gifted artist. Mom told me over and over again that her game plan was simply to try and keep Tawni reasonably safe until she was old enough to "outgrow" her demons. We can see how that strategy went-but whose to say any strategy would have been sucessful???

I respect all of your perspectives for this case-I will not pick sides on the sexual abuse issue because there is not enough information. It looks more and more like this prostitution issue was confined to WW and LDJ-the reason I mention it is because school records reflect her attendance for the preceding months-when would she have been on the street? Just throwing it out there...

 

[VASHLEY88]

It hurts me to hear the pain you went through, as well as Fairy and TL as children/teens...

Tawni did interpret affection from guys as love-attraction, gifts and the like. This comes from her brother-he told me that she had lots and lots of trouble at school being teased and harassed-he spent a lot of time fighting over it. She had dyslexia and some other learning issues, but Mom told me she has a published book of Tawni's artwork that was sponsored by a third party...simply because her talent was so outstanding. Tawni was by all accounts sweet, loving and quick to trust-but lashed out when people were being "mean." She wanted to be an actress-and she was already a gifted artist. Mom told me over and over again that her game plan was simply to try and keep Tawni reasonably safe until she was old enough to "outgrow" her demons. We can see how that strategy went-but whose to say any strategy would have been sucessful???

I respect all of your perspectives for this case-I will not pick sides on the sexual abuse issue because there is not enough information. It looks more and more like this prostitution issue was confined to WW and LDJ-the reason I mention it is because school records reflect her attendance for the preceding months-when would she have been on the street? Just throwing it out there...

I am so happy to hear that Tawni's outstanding artistic abilities were recognized in her own published book.

 

[fmw63]

I am so happy to hear that Tawni's outstanding artistic abilities were recognized in her own published book.

Yes. Even in elementary school.
http://books.google.com/books?id=Ku...a=X&oi=book_result&resnum=3&ct=result#PPA9,M1

page 9, left side

 

[believe09]

Yes. Even in elementary school.
http://books.google.com/books?id=Ku...a=X&oi=book_result&resnum=3&ct=result#PPA9,M1

page 9, left side

Thanks, FMW!

 

[VASHLEY88]

Yes. Even in elementary school.
http://books.google.com/books?id=Ku...a=X&oi=book_result&resnum=3&ct=result#PPA9,M1

page 9, left side

I saw that! That's our Tawni, eh?

 

[believe09]

Hi-all...things seem to falling apart with the Mazzone-OSullivan-Jacobsen family. Mike tells me his mother has requested that he no longer participate in her life if he continues to question and discuss the events leading up to Tawni's death and what may or may not have been done in the 9 years that followed. Mind you this is his version, complete with a voicemail that is purportedly from her that is pretty shocking.

I don't know what to say or do-I suspect the silence will not last-but the whole dynamic between them is volatile and complicated.

His advocate attorney will be plugging along with his participation in pursuing justice for Tawni, so Deb cannot "unsign" the consent forms that allowed this to move forward.

The whole family is at sixes and sevens at the moment, although a few of Deb's siblings have contacted her recently with mixed results.

Yikes.

 

[Cubby]

Oh man..... I was so hoping this would have been an eye opener light bulb moment for Deb. I'm saddened it doesn't appear to be that way at this time. I'm sure Mike as well as other family are familiar with the dynamics... Mike only needs to share and lean on those who are supportive of him and aren't going to gossip to the rest of the family leading to more greif.

:blowkiss: Believe for sticking through this with them and being an ear...

 

[ArizonaGiGi]

Hi-all...things seem to falling apart with the Mazzone-OSullivan-Jacobsen family. Mike tells me his mother has requested that he no longer participate in her life if he continues to question and discuss the events leading up to Tawni's death and what may or may not have been done in the 9 years that followed. Mind you this is his version, complete with a voicemail that is purportedly from her that is pretty shocking.

I don't know what to say or do-I suspect the silence will not last-but the whole dynamic between them is volatile and complicated.

His advocate attorney will be plugging along with his participation in pursuing justice for Tawni, so Deb cannot "unsign" the consent forms that allowed this to move forward.

The whole family is at sixes and sevens at the moment, although a few of Deb's siblings have contacted her recently with mixed results.

Yikes.

sigh. this makes me soooo sad for Mike Jr. As if he isn't going thru enough already. And Deb - she lost one child forever and is refusing the other. Wow! What a piece of work she is. The silver lining is that Mike Jr has lots of surrogate Aunties and Uncles on here that want to help him and be a part of his life forever.
Believe, please pass this along to him and tell him that we are all thinking about him and are here for him. And thank you for all that you do ! ! !

 

[believe09]

Mike is in MA with the Jacobsen side of the family and will be there until Saturday. He called me yesterday and said his heart was now completely broken because he has heard much more about Tawni's life in MA and it makes him even crazier that his mother took her away instead of leaving her here where she was doing so much better than she had been....not a surprise for any of us I suspect.

They had a small family only ceremony where they took a small memorial to Tawni's grandfather's grave and had an intimate service. Deb has told them that she is burying Tawni in her garden in GA-Mike's opinion is that you bury your animals in the garden....Oh My.

At this point Deb is not giving up any possessions or ashes of Tawni's-Deb told me in an email today that there are just not enough of her things to go around so she will keep them all.

Lord, please grant her a change of heart. I mean really.

 

[BeavisMom62]

That poor woman just gets stranger and stranger. I hope things come together for Deb and Mike, sooner rather than later.

 

[VASHLEY88]

Mike is in MA with the Jacobsen side of the family and will be there until Saturday. He called me yesterday and said his heart was now completely broken because he has heard much more about Tawni's life in MA and it makes him even crazier that his mother took her away instead of leaving her here where she was doing so much better than she had been....not a surprise for any of us I suspect.

They had a small family only ceremony where they took a small memorial to Tawni's grandfather's grave and had an intimate service. Deb has told them that she is burying Tawni in her garden in GA-Mike's opinion is that you bury your animals in the garden....Oh My.

At this point Deb is not giving up any possessions or ashes of Tawni's-Deb told me in an email today that there are just not enough of her things to go around so she will keep them all.

Lord, please grant her a change of heart. I mean really.

Goodness. I will pray that Deb turns around and at least lets Mike have some of her belongings. Her stance is probably that she is Tawni's only mother since she had many cousins and aunts. But Mike is Tawni's only sibling. Don't understand why she's hoarding everything since she seemed to be the only one taking no initiative to find Tawni.. sorry, I had to say it.

 

[Lucy's mom]

Sadly, I think Deb is doing what Deb has done her whole life....only thinking of Deb and no one else. I think deep down we all knew this about her considering Tawni was MJD for way too long. However, we wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt and believed that she was the grieving mother distraught over the death of her daughter 9 1/2 years ago. Her true colors are once again coming out now. I think she likes feeling in control of her "possessions" but I honestly don't think she's the distraught mother she wants everyone to think she is. Honestly, if she was, she and Mike would have made up a long time ago. Mike is her son...her flesh and blood and her baby. She simply doesn't care. Sorry...just had to speak my mind for a second about Deb.